Papa needs a man sitter.

Both my husband and I travel frequently for work. We are heading out of state for five nights the end of this month. We will be gone for one night during an upcoming weekend. Even with the army of people in Papa’s life providing temporary and permanent care, he is not in any condition to be left alone for a week, let alone a night.

I call Agency on Aging. I get the right one. Hurray! Things might be going our way.

Our CARE MANAGER Myra tells me in her comforting – I. work. for. the. government –  monotone voice that she will put in a request for a 24 hour PCA for our overnight trip next weekend and another one for our five day trip end of June.

I hang up, actually believing this will be done.

Seven Days Later-

I call Myra at the Agency on Aging. Right one again. But I’m not fooled this time.

“Mhm” she says when I remind her we are going away overnight in four days. “Well, I called in the request. They will get back to me…well…let me call her again.”

“Ok, we leave in four days. I need someone to care for him, he can’t stay alone and I have to go.”

“Ok,” Myra drones, bored to tears and wishing she could get her pension without actually having to work at the agency, and especially having to listen to desperate people like me everyday. Poor Myra.

I call Papa’s nurse Marcia at the VNA. I tell her my story, about needing care, about Papa’s worsening condition this weekend. Marcia suggests I look into respite care at a local nursing home just for this weekends. It will cost us, she warns, but it’s safe and secure.

I call a lovely looking facility in a town about 20 minutes away. It has nice pictures on its website and serves respite care and has a memory unit.

Nicole takes my call. She has the title Community Relations Director. She seems nice. She wants to know all about Papa before she’ll answers my questions. I share. She seems genuinely interested. I relax. Then she goes in for the kill.

“I so want to meet your father, he sounds charming and very interesting. Let me tell you about the pricing for respite care.”

I hold my breathe.

“We do require a thirty day stay for respite care. But from what you said that will cover this weekend trip for you and your husband, plus the end of the month trip. Included in our pricing is a private studio apartment, all the activities, skilled nursing care, all meals, wifi, cable, and housekeeping, all utilities, all home equipment such as a phone, kitchen tools, linens, etc.”

She left out the the wiring in the walls, the rug and the furnishings.

“For regular respite care it is $200 per day. If there is additional memory care needed, which will be assessed by our nursing staff, its $250 per day.”

$7500 to have someone watch Papa for one month.

I let that sink in.

I realize, as its sinking in, that we have two extra bedrooms in our home. And if we could bunk up two old people per room I could offer three elderly folk respite care every month for a grand total of $18,000 per month.

I hope Agency on Aging comes through with a PCA, otherwise it looks like Benny is traveling with us this month.